Friday, October 27, 2006

No need for a headline

I am ticked off.

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'Ain at 04:17

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Monday, October 23, 2006

Love Knows Not Its Own Depth Until The Hour Of Separation

I got dramatically sick this morning. I can't say for sure that this is due to the fact that I may be suffering from boyfriend-withdrawal-symptoms. This is very foreign to me.

And while this is not fun under the best of circumstances, I'm imagining it to be considerably less fun if I'm temporarily staying with my boyfriend and hoping to appear beautiful while nauseous. I know I would eventually abandon all attempts to look even mildly attractive while lying in bed in his drawstring pants, making forts of tissues, begging him to end my misery.

Okay, I seem to have unintentionally painted a more accurate picture of domestic life. I am still hoping that temporarily staying with him would feature me in my underwear cavorting about with a beer in hand, cooking and having wild sex in the kitchen...

I guess we'll only be pleasantly surprised.

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'Ain at 17:52

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Sunday, October 22, 2006

Be quiet and drive

The boyfriend will be gone for three days. Having learned from previous experiences, I'm not even going to attempt to believe that I will go for yoga everyday, quit smoking, and generally engage in healthy living. Instead I am going to embrace my inner sloth, eat everything in sight, and generally celebrate the fact that no one will be seeing me naked. (It was hard to find the silver lining there, but I did it).

I do however, need to put into practise some self control, particularly because we will be going on a quick vacation this weekend. I really hope I left myself enough time to lose all the weight I will inevitably gain over the next few days. Boys always stutter and stammer their way out of the question “Would you still love me if I got really fat?” Except for one of my friends, whose boyfriend responded “Well, I would have to talk to you about it because gaining weight when you’re in a relationship is really selfish.” There's a modicuum of truth in that, but it is just not a comforting answer.

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'Ain at 19:41

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Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Talking about love is like dancing about science

When Ian and I met, it felt like the entire universe conspired with us because over what seemed like only a few nights, the attraction manifested itself into spawns of uncontrollable thirst for more of something we can’t really put a name to.

It’s a chain reaction - the chemical precursors that signal the onset of an emotion, designed specifically to overwhelm logic and reason.

And it’s fascinating to read these reactions. Because people are, by design, based on a similar predication: a contingent affirmation that was meant to create a profound attachment to the people around them. But while they experience this in a general way, our experience is far more defined, and unexplainable at the same time.

And then for weeks, we struggled against it, we fought to deny it; but that was of course a lie. Of course, denial is the most predictable of all human responses. A momentary lapse of judgment, soon to be rectified because beneath the poised appearances, we are completely out of control. And we know that soon the why and the reason will be gone and all that matters is its existence itself.

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'Ain at 18:25

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Sunday, October 08, 2006

Note to self: Alleviate menstrual cramps

Turmoil of obscene emotions completely took me over today. It was however, completely called for, and I have absolutely every fucking reason to feel this way considering that I am sore, bloated, cranky, aching, sluggish and every other word associated with the period.

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'Ain at 09:56

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Thursday, October 05, 2006

To boldly go where no woman has gone before

Dinner at Handle Bar last night was just out of this world. To watch your man, in all his masculinity, seize in his hands what could’ve possibly been the best darned assemblage of red meat and bun ever, and then wolf it down with frothy ice cold beer was just… priceless. And the Tobasco hot wings… Good fucking lord, those chicken wings. Really. You wouldn’t think it’d be possible to burst into gastronomic emotions until you’ve eaten at Handle Bar.

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'Ain at 14:53

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